I think we all suffer from mommy guilt at some point in our lives. I have felt like a monster after snapping and losing my temper with my little one. I have told my little girl, let’s take a nap and try again later; when we wake up it will be a new day, a better day. Being a mom doesn’t make you perfect, and maybe our kids need to see that.
When I call my own mother in tears and tell her how I feel like I am failing she tells me “The fact that you feel badly, that you want to do better, that’s what makes you a good mom. If you were a monster, you wouldn’t care.”
A couple of months back I was stumbling through an all-time mom low. Baby-G was maybe nine months old at the time. I wasn’t getting nearly enough sleep. I was depressed. I was tired. I was short tempered. I found myself snapping at my kids (and my cat), and I felt really guilty about it.
I spoke to my mom on the phone and told her that I worried I was in the running for worse mom ever. She let me rant. She listened. She told me to try and get some rest (ha ha).The next day when she was out running errands she stopped by my house. She just stopped in for two minutes and handed me an old newspaper. Apparently she had been unpacking some boxes and had found this old Saturday coloured funnies lining the bottom of one. She said, “I thought you might appreciate this comic.” She gave me a hug. She said, “If you are worrying that you’re a bad mom then you’re probably doing alright”. And then she left.
The comic was an old For Better or For Worse strip (you can read it here), and it fit how I’d been feeling to a tee. Reading it, knowing someone else had been there, made me feel better. As usual, my mom knew just what I needed…
|Thanks Mom. I love you.|
Consider this a public service message to all you other mother’s out there. What they didn’t tell you in prenatal class is that Motherhood is imperfect, and some days it down right sucks. You are not alone. That one horrible moment you’re feeling guilty about? You’re kid will probably never even remember it. Keep calm and carry on. Oh and, try and get some sleep.
Oh yeah and thanks to Lynn Johnston for creating For Better or For Worse. I had no clue just how brilliant you were when I was reading these strips for the first time, back when I was a kid during the 80s. I’m so glad they’re being reprinted!